The Worst Interview EVER.

I had an interview a few weeks ago to work at *the company*.  I did HORRIBLY during the interview.  Let me tell you why.

I was not sure that I even wanted to work there - so it was pretty impossible for me to get pumped up enough to sell myself (and do things that would make it possible to sell myself - like um, preparation).  Also, remembering my interviews from before - ample preparation was not even necessary.  All I did on the initial interview (which was ironically almost exactly a year ago) was complete a lab. My boss told me that he has hired people that seemed competent - but couldn't even put a circuit together.  I know how to put a circuit together.

Another reason I didn't prepare is because that would SERIOUSLY cut into my crafting time.  Having a newborn and a wild boy toddler is enough to keep me busy in itself. I have to carve out ME-time.  And I just couldn't bring myself to use that ME time - for preparing for *the company*.

So, I go in the interview extremely unprepared for a test teach.  Which is exactly what he wants me to do.  I know what you are thinking:  "You just spent the better part of a year teaching this material, what is so hard about teaching it now?".  Well, I'll tell you.

I am more of a teacher than a performer.  I am good at finding out what people don't know - then showing them.  I am not good at teaching material to a group of people who already know the material - which actually wouldn't be teaching.  That would be performing.

Furthermore, the students in the class did NOT appreciate my teaching Or my performance.  My *lesson* was on something they already knew.  They were, understandably, totally ignoring me, making *annoyed faces* and doing other stuff. If this were a *real* class, there are things I could do to encourage them to pay attention.  For one, I could call on them by name (which clearly was impossible as I didn't know their names).  I could go up to them specifically to see what the distraction was and maybe redirect my lesson.  Or if all else failed - their grade would suffer.  Obviously, this was out of the question - as their grade was not affected at all by me.  And most importantly, I didn't even feel comfortable trying to force them to pay attention to me. If I were them, I would totally feel like I was a waste of their time as well.

When I actually started teaching (I tried to stall - but the Chair was onto me and kind rushed me along), my mind went blank.  Seriously.  I didn't even remember the voltage drop of a geranium diode.  Actually, I couldn't even remember which diode was in their tool boxes - silicon or geranium. And I guess this wouldn't be a big deal to you - if you haven't worked on electronic circuits before. So, just take my word for it - it is BASIC information in this field.

So, as I am teaching, fumbling over the most basic of material, I am making comments like, "I am Jacking this up." or "I can't believe I am doing this horribly."  REALLY.  I am ACTUALLY saying these things.  As I am saying them, I regret saying them - which pushes me into MORE nervousness.  So, when the Chair asks me a question, like "Why do silicon and geranium have the voltage drops they have?"  I actually do not understand the question.  I pause for a much too long moment then respond with: "I don't know." - instead of something smooth like: "Let me get back to you on that."  What.The.Heck.Is.Wrong.With.Me.

I am so horrible, a student is actually making the motion of cutting his neck like telling me to "Cut it out".  I look at him dumbfounded (cause I know he is not saying what I think he is saying) and ask him what he means.  He tells me that I can just go ahead and stop now.  OMG.  I can't turn red, but I know I am sweating like a grown man.  I tell him that I can't stop until the Chair tells me to stop. And the Chair says: "No, go ahead. I am enjoying this."  Then I say, "Well, I'm not."  Can you BELIEVE that???  I need to just put a sock in my mouth.

Finally, finally, finally (miraculously) the interview is over as I have gotten to the end of the lesson.

Then, you know what the Chair says?  He says: "I like you, when can you start?".

What?